You know what the most annoying thing about having this blog is? It’s that I have so much to tell you, but I have to WRITE it. And I’ve been quite bad at writing lately. My own journal is full of half-finished entries abandoned mid-sentence and dated months apart. And it’s not like I haven’t got things to write about. There’s the incident with the mangosteen that landed me in the ER. There’s my first theatre gig since 2018 that I was cast in, rehearsed for months, and acted in at the Toronto Fringe Festival. There’s my brother’s first visit to Toronto. There’s always whatever new thing I’m doing with my budget to try to stretch $2500 over a whole month. There’s the annual CFC Actors’ Conservatory application period about which I always seem to have something to say. But instead of writing about any of these, I have a file full of titled blog posts with only a few sentences under each, if anything.
I can’t seem to write planned out blog posts. I can only do these stupid long stream-of-consciousness entries, and it’s annoying as heck. I thought maybe I was burned out, or maybe I was too busy with my three jobs and rehearsals and auditions and all that. Any spare time I had would go to my social life. Writing, which I thought would be a constant in my life, has not been put on the back burner—it has fallen off the stove entirely.
Perhaps I ought to return to my stream-of-consciousness ways. I know this blog gets more attention than it used to, and that has raised my standards for what I write here. But people mostly come for the CFC stuff, so anything else I write about probably doesn’t need that much thinking out.
Anyway, for this post, since I’m already writing, I should pick one of those many things I’ve been meaning to write about and actually write about it. Let me tell you about Orbit.
Back in March or April, I don’t really remember, a friend told me she knew someone who was looking for a BIPOC woman to read for a character at a script reading and asked whether I’d be interested. The character’s name was Roe and the script was titled Orbit. I said yes. A few days later, I read through one of my favourite scripts I’ve ever read and completely fell in love with the character I was reading for. The script reading went well. From what I heard, people liked me in the role. I asked the writer/director to let me know when auditions would be, and that was it.
A while later, I got an email with a link to the casting notice. I submitted, then took a look around the site at other audition notices there, and submitted for another show. I later got an email from the producer of Orbit requesting a self tape audition of either the scene or monologue provided. Before I had the chance to start learning lines, the writer/director emailed me and said I didn’t have to do a tape; she was sending me straight to callbacks.
I also heard from the other show I’d submitted to. They requested that I prepare a monologue of my choice for an in-person audition. This was good. The audition was on a Wednesday, a few days before the Orbit callbacks on Saturday. I didn’t know anything about this other show; they didn’t give out any excerpts of the script or much description of the characters, so I was going in blind. I figured I could use it as practice for the Orbit callback.
I’ve had a rough go of theatre auditions in Toronto. Some of my worst-ever auditions have been Toronto theatre auditions, especially when I started auditioning in 2023, and I’m pretty sure I’ve been blacklisted by a few people for how terrible my auditions have been. The bad auditions also made me anxious about theatre auditions, which then made my auditions worse, which made my anxiety worse, and so on in this awful downward spiral. It got so bad that in 2024, I decided to take the whole year off of theatre auditions so I could get my shit together. It was kind of ridiculous. I never even get stage fright when I perform on stage with a sold-out audience, but alone in a room with a handful of casting folks, I shit my pants. My year off had the intended effect, however, and I was back to auditioning for theatre in 2025. Some of my best-ever auditions ended up being Toronto theatre auditions in that year, but I still didn’t hear back. So it goes, in this business. But as long as I’ve done my best, the rejection never bothers me. I just enjoy auditioning, and I’ve learned not to expect to ever get cast.
Well, imagine my shock when, all in one week, I was offered the role of Roe in Orbit, and the role in this other production I auditioned for. One more offer in a row and I would have repeated the hat trick that started off my acting career way back in the day! (Spoiler: I have not repeated the hat trick…yet.)
From the information I was given, Orbit would be playing from June 30th to July 2nd, and the other production would be July 3rd to July 12th. It would have been difficult, but I like a challenge. I accepted both. And then I found out there had been a typo. Orbit was actually June 30th to July 12th, thereby overlapping with the other production and complicating my already difficult plans. I checked the times of each show, and again, none of them overlapped! There was one day when the shows would be only 30 minutes apart, and the venues were 15 minutes apart by car, without traffic, which would be the closest call of all of them, but I figured maybe if I pre-ordered a car and changed my hair and makeup on the way to the second location, I could make it.
Someone who cared about my wellbeing thought this might be too much for me, and suggested I ask someone who knew better. I told one of my acting teachers who then said to me plainly, “Ivy, that’s crazy. Don’t be stupid. You can’t do that.”
Shit. Fine.
I read through both scripts. Orbit had called to me from the moment I’d first read it, and I knew I loved the character, so I chose it. I had to back out of my agreement with the other production, which I hated doing. I wish I could have done them both, but ultimately it’s better to put my all into one project and let someone else put their all into the other, than to half-ass both projects and burn myself out in the process.
After two months of rehearsals, Orbit reached the stage at Factory Theatre Studio in the Toronto Fringe. It was a hit, and won both Patron’s Pick for our location as well as Volunteer’s Choice for all of Fringe. As for me, I had a blast and finally broke my Toronto theatre curse.
Precarious Writer 